Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Fall Frenzy

Happy Tuesday morning, everyone! Isn't Fall beautiful?! I have never appreciated the beauty of an autumn day quite as much as I have this season. In a move that is completely uncharacteristic of myself, I took a spontaneous drive through some gorgeous country with my windows down and the music playing last week. It was so nice just to forget about my school work, put away my phone, and enjoy the scenery that God has provided! Shame on me for not taking advantage of this before now! 20 years in, and I am finally taking moments to stop and look at a beautiful sunrise or to take a walk around the gorgeous changing trees. Thank you, God, for your breath-taking creation.

But along with the amazing autumn scenes, there are also gloomy days.. Windy, cold, rainy, gloomy days. Days where I don't want to get out of bed because I know that I won't get to stop moving or working until it's time for bed again. Days when I feel like I can't do anything right. Or to paraphrase Spurgeon, even days when the fires of tribulations would consume me, if not for the Lord to dampen the flames. But thankfully, we are promised that these days of trials will be cut short for God's chosen people. God chooses to look upon us with favor, and I ought to be forever grateful. As if taking all my sins and nailing them to the cross weren't enough, he continues to save me from tribulation. What a promise!

Often I am guilty of stopping right there. "Wow God, that's so awesome. Thank you for your promises!" But now, what will my reaction be? Thankfulness is definitely an appropriate response, but how will I show my thankfulness aside from just saying it? I think I am learning. Stopping to notice the amazing ways that God shows off everyday, deviating from my scheduled day to take a drive with Him, truly worshipping Him with my songs, taking advantage of the gift of prayer by interceding for loved ones, spending time in His word, sharing His Good News. For the first time, I feel like I am truly maturing. This season of my life has definitely brought circumstances that have matured me in worldly sense, I suppose. But more importantly, I have begun to really see God in ways that I never have. And I'm struggling to even put these thoughts into words, but I can say that I have grown. Thanks in part to the opportunity to experience and witness the trials of God's people and how He always delivers us in HIS way and in HIS time. Oh how deep the Father's love for us.

I've been writing this from my home away from home.. the Civil Engineering Study Lounge. When I got here, then sun was rising, and the wind was blowing. As I finish, I'm looking out these huge windows and can see the sun shining bright on the trees and the crystal clear sky above it all. What a blessing.
I hope everyone enjoys this gorgeous day that God provided. And smile a little bit, because I'm praying for you!

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Come Quickly!

Long time, no blog!! I have missed my blog oh so much. It has been over a month since I've sat down to put my thoughts into words.. Not only have I been unbelievably busy, but my thoughts have been all over the place. Just when I think I know what to say, I hear or read or experience something else to consider.

My last 2 posts were about my struggle to be completely fulfilled with Christ and truly longing to be in His eternal presense. Boy, when I need direction, God surely supplies! My world, along with so many others, was completely rocked when Micayla Patterson went home to be with Jesus a few weeks ago... Of course everyone that knows Micayla is heartbroken, but more importantly we are all looking forward to the day we can see her again, and we are confident that God's perfect will is in action. This situation made it unbelievably clear that I should be so prepared and excited to be with Christ! This world is full of disapointment and heartache - Oh I long to be in heaven.

Lately, several friends have remarked on how I have been looking tired, or how I seem down or not myself.. Not only have I been physically exhausted from school, but I just allow myself to feel bad for myself. I find myself pleading the system that is my life for a break! And amidst all the late nights, early morning, and days packed full of school work and struggling to make time for my family and friends, I have completely neglected my Father, who can supply the only true relief! Yesterday morning, I had a little break down, and finally came to my senses. I put aside my studying and my working out. I sat at my desk, read my Daily Dose of Spurgeon (This man's commentary blows my mind!), and got in the Word. The passage Spurgeon wrote about was when I am weary, God lights my candle and no one can blow it out. I started journaling my prayer and asked God to set my candle on fire! And then I realized - He has probably been standing behind me this whole time, trying to get my attention, holding the match, and I haven't turned around to hold my candle out to Him! Humbling revelation. And the closing to Spurgeon's writing was, "Further on, in His own good time, I shall be where they need no candle, neither light of the sun. Hallelujah!" What a perfect reminder of how wonderful Heaven will be. When I learn to immediately rely on him instead of worrying, or getting angry and frustrated? God is ALWAYS there ready and willing to supply what I need, and instead of praying the He fulfill His promises , I need to wake up! He isn't holding out on me - I've been ignoring Him.

It has been a month of hard work, tears, and frustration, but moreover, a time of revelation from the Lord. God has done an excellent job of reminding me that this is not my home. So here I am, truly saying "Lord Jesus, come quickly!"

I don't know if any of these thoughts made the least bit of sense to any reader, but after a month of listening, thinking, reading, and praying, this is what I have come up with. I hope that you are all having a beautiful week and remembering to rejoice in Him always. Loves.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Portion Control.

Today is Thursday. An absolutely gorgeous Thursday! Let us rejoice and be glad. I hope everyone has had a wonderful week this far. Mine has been quite nice :) My classes, though great in number, seem interesting, and I'm excited about most of them! But what I'm even more excited about it what I read this morning in my daily dose of Spurgeon..

On Monday I wrote on how I have been challenged to see that Christ is more than enough for me. And I've been working hard to remind myself of that throughout the week. And because God answers prayers, He sent me a reminder! And in His perfect time. Ya know how you hear a great message or have a great quiet time or go away to an awesome conference and you come back with that message really weighing heavy on your heart? And for me.. If I don't work to continuously remind myself and work towards this new goal or way of thinking, I'm good for about 3 days. After that, I lose my focus again. Or sometimes forget it all together! So here I am, 3 days after posing this challenge to myself, and God provides a reminder :)

Speaking about the Lord's people: "God is their portion, Christ their companion, the Spirit their comforter, Earth their lodge, and Heaven their home... [His] covenant is a treasury of wealth, a granary of food, a fountain of life, a store-house of salvation, a charter of peace, and a haven of joy."

How can I not be overjoyed?! If I am truly a joint heir with Jesus, how can I not be more than satisfied? Earth truly is just my lodge. A temporal home that is so unimpressive compared to the glories of Heaven. His covenant gives me life! And not the life that I have been so attached to here, but one that will last forever!

I am so thankful for this reminder that God provided today. "I say to myself, 'The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for Him.'" -Lamentations 3:24
..Ya know the first time I ever heard that verse? I had broken up with my first boyfriend.. We'd been dating for almost 2 years, and I was pretty crushed.. I was too young to know about true love, but I was still heart broken. And a precious friend called me the next day and shared that verse with me. I instantly knew that I would be fine. I would move on and be even better than before. And as trivial as losing my boyfriend at 15 may seem now, the lesson I learned is still powerful!

God is my portion. Christ is my companion! And Heaven is my home :)

I am praying today that everyone will be more than satisfied with Christ. Looking towards Heaven and being eager to arrive. Everyone please have a sensational day and remember to rejoice a little!

Monday, August 23, 2010


GOOOOOD MORNING EVERYONE! The first day of school is upon us, and I am so excited! I have missed blogging and have been anxiously awaiting today so I could do my back to school post.

This summer was... different. In short, I made new friends, grew closer to existing ones, and grew apart from others. I am learning to embrace change, love, trials, and disappointment. I have cried. I have laughed. I have loved. And I have drawn closer to the Lord through it all. So! An enormous thank you to my family, sweet friends, and loved ones for all the support, prayers, and love :) And I'm unashamedly asking for more of the same this semester!!

One of the changes in my life this summer has been attending UBC with Dan and his family. I am beyond excited to get involved and meet more members of the body of Christ! Yesterday, Pastor Mike preached from 2 Corinthians 4 and 5. First, I am so thankful that I can go each week and hear him fearlessly, unashamedly, boldly, and truthfully share God's word. He is not afraid to offend with the truth of the Word. And I'd say he is often successful in that! And each week I come away challenged. Though be it uncomfortable.. it is a blessing!

At the beginning of the sermon, I was posed with a question. "Does Christ satisfy me?" Does He really, truly, honestly satisfy? Do I want Him more than anything? All the time? And I had to say no.. I spend so much time and effort thinking and planning for my future here on Earth. I am often consumed with thoughts of marriage, sex, career, finances, graduating, where I'm gonna live.. If Christ is truly enough for me, why am I spinning in circles trying to sort out a future that is so uncertain? Am I willing to fore-go marrying the person I love, or the perfect job to be taken up with Christ and be happy about it? I'm guilty of wishing that Christ would wait to return until I've accomplished things here! I'm so unsure of what Heaven will be like.. But I'm commanded:
"Fix your eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen in temporary, but what is unseen is eternal." 2 Cor. 4:18

A successful career.. A loving husband.. A new place to live.. All great things in any one's book, even if they are temporary. But I MUST be convinced that the best of all of these pale in comparison to one moment in Christ's presence.

I am challenged to retrain myself. Christ's love for me is more than enough! Everyday, I have to remind myself that Heaven, though unseen, will be more fulfilling than anything I can ever imagine. So hopefully, I can soon say with confidence, "Lord Jesus, come quickly."
Lord, forgive me for being so attached to the things of this world. You have blessed me beyond measure, and it's hard to think that someday I will trade it in to be with You. But it won't even feel like a sacrifice once I'm basking in your glory in Heaven.

Now I am ready! Ready to begin a new year in college! And with this year come a lot of big decisions. So I'm shamelessly asking for prayer and support :) There will undoubtedly be times when I'm sitting at my desk, sleep deprived, in tears, up to my eyeballs in the hardest work I've ever done.. perhaps that will prompt me to beg for Christ's quick return! Ha!
Thank you in advance for the thoughts and prayers! Sending love to my favorite freshman, Kirsten Ramay. Good luck today!! :)

I am praying that everyone has a blessed week and that we all fix our eyes on the prize!

Monday, June 7, 2010

Standing on the Promises

Hello, all! And Happy Summer! I'm halfway through my summer class (thank the Lord)! I hope that everyone is having a great summer so far. I've been a busy beaver it seems like. In the last 3 weeks, I've been to Kansas City, Joplin, and most recently, Heavener, OK! My family and I enjoyed a great time at the Bently Family Reunion in OK this past weekend. Good times!

This morning, I was reminded by a sweet friend that God's mercies are new every morning. So first, I'm gonna stop and PTL for that! Mercy is defined as leniency and compassion shown toward an offender by a person charged with administering justice. God is in the position of administering justice, and I am a vile offender. Yet every morning, His mercy is renewed. Every morning I can wake up and claim the promise of His mercies. His compassions never fail!

But sometimes, in the midst of God trying to shower me with mercy and forgiveness, I just don't want it. I cannot allow myself to accept it! If I step back and take a good, long, hard look at my life, it is beyond obvious that I am grossly undeserving. What has anyone ever done to deserve the love and forgiveness that Christ offers? Nothing. Not one single thing! Our righteousnesses are all as filthy rags, and not one of us are good.. There's a surprise, right?! So, how do I come to terms with this promise? How does one just flat out accept mercy and forgiveness that they are so undeserving of? I guess the same way you accept any gift. With a thankful heart. And this gift is so unbelievably generous, that my thankfulness must be that much greater. And along with that comes a commitment to love Him, live for Him, and serve Him.

Everyday, I am challenging myself to wake up and stand firmly on His promises. Unwavering, I will claim His mercy and forgiveness. I cannot be foolish enough to think that I can earn anything God offers. So today, I am "standing on the promises of Christ my King."

Sunday, May 23, 2010

Video Update from Matt Chandler

Costly Faith?

Hello!!! Looooong time since I've been here. I have been spending time in the word, just haven't gotten the chance to share in a while. Brief Update: Finals went better than expected. I lived in the study lounge for an entire week, but I pulled it off. Still on scholarship, so I am pleased :) I've started summer school now, and I have my first test tomorrow!! Eek!!
My sister's wedding (on May 8th) went off without a hitch. She was a beautiful bride, and they enjoyed a lovely cruise for their honeymoon.

This morning I got to go with Dan to church, and the speaker preached out of Luke 14. He explained the cost of following Christ may seem steep. People face persecution, trials, and circumstances that just don't seem worth it sometimes. But in the end, does our faith really cost us anything? Did we have to pay the price to have this great salvation? No. What we are called to give up pales in comparison to what was given for us. The speaker also showed a very powerful video from a preacher in Dallas. Matt Chandler, the head pastor The Village in Dallas, TX, found out last year that he a had brain tumor. Before his surgery, he made this video for his church family. The video should be posted above. I'm gonna leave with you that and challenge you to examine the true cost of following Christ. I was completely humbled and encouraged by this man's faith. Enjoy and God bless. Loves.